When He Sleeps
by GrimTheReaper
Summary: When Orihara Izaya sleeps, he tries not to think because he knows that 'Humanity Hates Him'. One Shot. No Pairings. Worksafe. Gen. Cross-posted at the drrrgen.


Title: When He Sleeps  
>Genre: GenHorror  
>Paring: None.<br>Status: One shot.  
>Summary: When Orihara Izaya sleeps, he tries not to think because he knows that 'Humanity Hates Him'.<br>Warnings: Worksafe. No pairing. Gen.

A/N: Cross-posted at the _**'DURARARA! GEN MEME.'**_  
>Disclaimer: Durarara! belongs to <em>Narita<em> Ryōgo, I do not own any of the characters in this fanfiction.

__-x-x-x-

_Writhing in pain, he feels cold sweat running down his body._

He hears their words and tries to think there isn't a shred of truth in them and everything is nothing but lies. The words are being whispered all around him. He thinks that if they had a physical form, they'll be creeping up his body. He thinks - knows - that this is a dream and he'll wake up by pinching himself.

But he also knows that it's not going to work because he'd tried it so many – one too many – times already.

_It is as if the shadows are crawling over his skin as he curls up and hugs himself tighter._

_The light are on but the shadows never seem to leave._

It isn't the dark that scares him, it's the fact that this is so similar to that thing that he will never admit that he is afraid of. He doesn't try to think of the fact that this is actually very true and that it can happen at any time.

_**"Hate. Hate. Hate. Hate. We hate you."**_

Everything is so very dark and he can't even see his own hand in front of him. The feeling is suffocating, and it seems as if he is being crushed down by the very weight of their words. He knows that it might very well be the truth.

_**"You have no right to love us. We hate you. Detest."**_

_He wakes up in the middle of the night once again(how many times has it been already?). His shirt was soaked in perspiration, sticking to his skin._

_He's shivering and he feels the creeping of the shadows on his skin. He highly doubts a hot shower could even stop the chilling feeling on his skin._

_He tries to convince himself that the shadows aren't really there and that everything is all just a horrible nightmare. But it doesn't work. Because no matter how he wishes, pleads and screams, the shadows behind his eyes never leave._

The form that humanity takes is grotesque, but what that is even more disgusting is the words that come out of its mouth. The blob that seems to be the personification of humanity enjoys taunting him, in every move, in every word.

_It's his worse nightmare, that the very thing he loves hates him._

He doesn't like the way a grin appears on humanity. Because after that, everything fades to black and he sees nothing at all but the grin that reminds him so much of the cherish cat.

He isn't supposed to be Alice. He is supposed to be the The Queen (or King) of hearts.

_The insane, grinning farce he puts up is nothing more than a show for people. It is also one of the reasons why he hates Shizu-chan so much. It's because Heiwajima Shizuo can see right through him and his farce._

_It scares him (not that he would ever admit it) to see his face in the mirror when he is grinning.  
><em>  
>The words 'hate hate hate' are always being repeated whenever he sees the blob of darkness looking at him with its too big eyes.<p>

_Humans call him selfish, egoistical and many more other names. He taunts people, he plays with them, trick them and utterly destroy their lives. It's for his own selfish sake, really. He doesn't want to be forgotten, he wants to have an impact on this world. So he settles for second best._

_In actual fact, he is afraid that once he dies, people will become happy and forget about him._

He hates when he feels as if he is floating, or falling and there never seems to be an end. He is falling, falling, falling and...

He wants it to end, he thinks to himself as he tries to cover his ears and let out a silent scream.

_If he cannot get them to love him, he'll get them to hate him. At least he'll stay in their hearts this way._

_Although, sometimes, he thinks it's worse than the Void._

The place where he cannot get away is the worse. It seems to be as if he is stuck in a Möbius strip that keeps going round and round and round and all the time the chanting of humanity keeps going on.

But never once did he open his eyes and stop to look out.

_That night, when Izaya falls asleep that night to the deceptively gentle rustling of the trees. He sincerely hopes that he will wake up again._

_But little does he know._


End file.
